You know, every Sunday i give an invitation and when i do i will mention stuff like Baptism, joining the church, rededication, but i got to be honest with you, i want to answer the invitation myself sometimes, i mean really i do.
I haven't for several reasons, one of which being that church folks see it as a scandal enough when people do it to begin with (although this is a minority of church folks to begin with, but, it happens, sadly) and also, can the Pastor redidicate?
On the surface this seems like an easy question, "Of Course he can", i mean everyone is entitled to public repentance, including the pastor, but then when i look at it deeper, i dont see it that way, I mean i should, but, i dont.
Only those who know me really well know how much of a sinner i am, because, i am. I have as much of issues with sin as anybody, ever. But i dont think people always want to know that. I think people alot of times want to believe that at least someone can be a picture of how we should be, that it is actually possible to live sinless, to not let God or your loved ones down daily, but sorry to say it, thats not me.
Repentance is (to me) the hardest thing about following Jesus. It means that we have to put to death (Colossians 3:5) the things that we are doing. And that is really hard. If sin wasn't enjoyable, we wouldnt do it, so obviously, i do it. But yes, i need to put it to death. It just needs to die and die fast.
So i guess, without specific confession, this is me answering my own invitation. I need to rededicate myself as a follower of Christ Jesus. I need to focus of His Will and not my ego, negativity, pride or apathy.
I guess posts like this are the reason i named my blog "Weekly Rambling From A Churchy Nerd" becuase, well, this is just rambling. I am really sorry for anyone that I have heart in my career of sinning, and if you need an exact apology, call or e-mail me and i will most likely ablige.
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